If your ex keeps resurfacing in your life like that obnoxious pop-up notification, that may be some of the signs your ex is testing you.
There are a number of signs that your ex is trying to test you. Learn about these behaviors’ key causes and warning signs.
They try to make you jealous
When an ex makes you feel jealous, it’s one of the most common indicators that they’re trying to test you. If you keep in touch with your ex, they can make you envious. By telling you about their new romantic endeavors. They make an effort to discuss it with you and seem genuinely curious about how the news affected you.
If you exclusively communicate via social media, they may post romantic selfies or other images to demonstrate how much fun they are having away from you. Although it isn’t mature, admitting that we all want the people who are important to us to miss us is honest. Anyone who has ever been the object of someone else’s jealousy knows that, while it sometimes prompts a response, it’s rarely one that is desirable.
They want an ego boost
It’s also possible that your ex is putting you to the test in an effort to get you back. Even if it’s somewhat of a game, the majority of people participate because they feel they need or want the ego boost. They are aware of your ability to assist them in achieving their desire to feel beautiful.
See, if your ex has been expecting you to come back and you don’t, it’ll throw them off and lead them to start abusing drugs or alcohol to try to sate their want for approval. You’ll notice additional mental ruses in that circumstance. They insist that you go after them.
Your ex tries testing your boundaries
One of the most obvious signs that he’s doing this is when he keeps doing bad things to test if you’ll let him or how long until you recoil. It exhibits an egregious lack of respect. Why would you keep asking questions like, “Is my ex-girlfriend testing me?” or “Why is he testing me?” when the answer is obvious? They don’t give a damn about you. No rational individual would purposefully do harm to another person after making a commitment to love and allegiance.
Digging through the past
If your ex is a mature individual, they’ll want to let go of this emotional weight before starting again with you. There are moments when it feels like they are merely scouring the past to destroy your heart further. You can rely on the need to settle the score before continuing their romance with you being one of the regular motives for this type of behavior.
Once they’re certain that you two are over everything that happened, your ex will return, therefore it’s up to you to prove to them that you have changed for the better. After all, what good is getting back together if you constantly remember how difficult things were before?
Now is the time to demonstrate to them that you are fully cognizant of your errors and that you have no intention of making the same ones again. Of course, this kind of conduct may indicate that your ex is merely seeking reconciliation. If so, they wouldn’t exhibit any of the other signs on this list!
They lurk on your social media
The fact that your ex has been lurking on your social media accounts, checking your stories, loving your previous posts, or even playing follow-and-unfollow games with you may indicate that they haven’t made an effort to get in touch after the breakup.
If your ex behaves in this manner, they might be trying to get your attention. They use false social media techniques to see if you are still interested in them rather than contacting you directly.
Your ex is pursuing you but doesn’t want to commit
One of the most common signs that your ex is testing you is their hot and cold behavior. They go through periods where they crave constant contact with you. Then came distance and a turning away. People act in this way for a variety of reasons, men in particular. Your ex’s behavior may irritate and confound you. You are continually concerned that you may be to blame for their withdrawal. You should be aware that your ex’s issues with commitment are probably more closely tied to this type of erratic behavior than they are to you. They wish to formally rekindle their relationship with you, but something stands in the way.
Asking you questions about your current relationship
Your ex will want to know whether you are truly happy or if you are just acting happy because you post on social media about how happy you are with your new relationship. They will therefore question you extensively about your new connection when you speak.
Your ex is aware of your quirks, therefore they will know just what questions to ask you. If they really know you well, they’ll also be able to tell if you’re lying. It is hoped that you are unhappy in your relationship so that they can intervene and make everything well.
Your ex will pretend they’ve moved on
Even if they haven’t moved on, your ex still misses you so much that they spend their nights sobbing into their pillows. They will act as though they have moved on. By cutting off communication, your ex will do this. Overnight, they’ll increase from zero to one hundred. They were phoning, messaging, and pleading with you to get back together one minute, and then they vanished.
Your exchanged tactics after realizing that the first one wasn’t working. They do this in the hopes that you would either start missing them or become concerned that something has happened. If your ex is truly desperate, they may cease updating their social media accounts, which may make you worry even more. If you fall for the trap, you’ll call to see how they’re doing.
Your ex will show you how much they’ve changed for you
Instead of playing hot and cold, your ex can demonstrate how much they’ve changed and make sure you know it’s for your benefit. And you’ll be able to tell they’re trying a little too hard because it will be crystal clear to you.
They might pull out the expensive purses and pricey perfumes if you had difficulties with them dressing too casually or giving care to how they look. Really, it’s rather pitiful. Even if you split up, he’ll start white knighting you if you had complained that they never stood up for you.
They seek you out for emotional support
If they have issues after the breakup, your ex can come looking for you out of the blue. And if it happened too soon after the split, it might be best to avoid them. If you broke up with them months or years ago, you might want to give them the benefit of the doubt. If you and your ex were close friends before you started dating and you are aware that you are the only person they trust, this is especially true.
The Ending Note
What are you going to do about it now that you know your ex wants to start dating you again? Consider the primary cause of your breakup as your first step. Stay away if nothing has changed, but if you think it’s worthwhile to try again, go for it.